Well, I was not going to blog about American Idol. My favorite part of the show is the schadenfreude of the “audition” portion of the show. Plus, last week I cringed as the dorks (for the most part) butchered some of the greatest music of all time.

So, imagine my shock and horror when I found out they were doing The Beatles *again* tonight! I just can’t hold back…

Amanda Overmyer
Yes, the “Lafayette” she mentioned is in Indiana and happens to be my home town. But she is such a one-trick pony… last week she was barely tolerable, this week, I wanted her to do Helter Skelter… instead she butchered Back in the USSR.

Kristy Lee Cook
I decided last week, when she destroyed Eight Days a Week in some sort of Grand Ole Opry train wreck, that I hated her. This week, I still hate her. She murdered You’ve Got to Hide Your Love Away. She couldn’t pick a key. She couldn’t hit actual notes. Do not mess with *The Beatles* melodies. She simply cannot sing and is so boring. Please, go.

David Archuleta
It wasn’t his greatest performance, but this kid is really likable… and he’s much better doing thoughtful, slower songs. The Long and Winding Road isn’t my favorite either, but he sang it well.

Michael Johns
A Day in the Life bastardized and chopped down into 1:30? Dude, who thought that would work???! An uninspired performance and a horrible arrangement. I appreciate that he dedicated it to his friend, but it was a pretty bad performance.

Brook White
Oh, poor George. He doesn’t get the credit he deserves for writing some truly excellent songs. And worse, people do things like this… oh, what an abomination. And seriously, every time she opens her mouth, I like her less. Considering I didn’t really like her to begin with, she should shut up. Bottom three? Fingers crossed!

David Cook
Clearly one of the most talented–even if is resorting to ripping off Whitesnake. Seriously, Whitesnake??? But he is consistently entertaining and did a pretty good job. The “Frampton” effect was super cheesy… and I just. don’t. like. him. I couldn’t put my finger on it until Simon called him “smug,” and then I realized that’s it… he comes off as a real smug guy… more full of himself than his performances so far warrant. He’s clearly talented, but he just rubs me the wrong way. So I don’t really want to see him go very far.

Carly Smithson
Great song, pretty well sung. It wasn’t a “blow me away” performance, but it was solid.

Jason Castro
Well, I’m not going to give him much credit for being smart… but his rendition of Hallelujah was pretty great a few weeks ago, and he did a decent job on Michelle. He’s the exact opposite of Cook–he’s not smug at all–he’s just plain goofy. And I’ll take a reasonably talented goofball over a reasonably talented jerk anyday.

Syesha Mercado
Yawn. This girl is so cute… and so dull. What did she sing again? It was 30 seconds ago and I’ve already forgotten!! Oh, yeah, Yesterday… beautiful song, pretty girl, utterly forgetable performance.

Chickezie
Well, last week, he *tore up* She’s a Woman. I mean, it was actually really awesome. This week, he tried the same formula, on I’ve Just Seen a Face (not a great Paul song to begin with) and it just didn’t work as well. I still like the guy.

Ramiele Malubay
There’s got to be one true karaoke performance per show. This was it… Bad. High school talent show bad. Karaoke bad. This should land her in the bottom three…

Update: So Amanda was booted… not too surprising. At least Kristy Lee Cook was in the bottom three again! Amanda was really a one-trick pony, so her time was short anyway, I doubt she’ll be missed.

So, Stephon Marbury thinks dog fighting is a sport??

“You know, from what I hear, dogfighting is a sport. It’s just behind closed doors.”

Okay, Stephon. The next time the Knicks lose, would you prefer to be shot, drowned, set on fire, or electrocuted?

While I’m spending the summer in Professional Responsibility, learning gems of ethical wisdom, like don’t accept sex as a form of payment from your clients, don’t steal their money, and don’t fabricate evidence, TB Andrew is out there exposing people to an extreme drug-resistant tuberculosis. What a great PR machine for the legal profession.

So, let’s see….

1. The guy knew he had TB *before* he left for Europe to get married.

2. He claims he didn’t know it was the drug-resistant strain, but you know what? YOU STILL HAD TB, JACKASS.

3. But what does he do when he finds out it’s a rare form that is really difficult to treat? He flies home. He’s exposed at least two trans-Atlantic flights, and four connecting flights in Europe. How many lives has this jerk put at risk?

4. Oh, and just in case you thought our border security actually meant something, the custom agent *_ignores_* the computer pop-up warning to hold and treat him as contagious and just lets him through.

There is so much that disturbs me about this story, I don’t even know where to start. First, I can’t believe the complete, utterly selfish and completely unethical behavior of this jackass.

He deserves to have his license to practice suspended at least, if not be disbarred. Second, if you had any illusions about airport security keeping us safe from terrorism, they should be shot to hell now.

Unreal.

I don’t know how I worked without these for so long…

Textile allows you to use characters like ==_underscores_== and ==*asterix*== for _italics_ and *bold* formatting in MT. SmartyPants converts \”straight\” quotes into “smart” quotes–and handles em dashes–as well as ellipses.
Hooray!

…but this makes me nervous:

Now, I understand marketing and overall, it’s a good idea. But speaking as someone who lives within the blast radius of a Target store, I do wish they had a different logo.